Shit Happens- August 8, 2019

Waking up when camping in the middle of nowhere is pretty great. Feeling the wind through the tent, the smell of the earth just inches from your nose and the heat of the sun attempting to intrude the tent and enter your skin. It’s freeing and glorious. Want to know what the opposite of that feeling is? The feeling of having to poop when you are hours away from a bathroom.

We had talked about this bathroom-less campsite(if you can even call it that), and worried about this bathroom-less campsite, extensively on the bus over the last few days. “What happens if you have to go?” “What do you do with the toilet paper?” “How deep of a hole do you need to dig?…” Convinced there was absolutely no way I was ever going to poop in a hole, I happily told myself I could hold it the whole time in the bush. That it’s only for a few hours(about 14). Despite my brain’s confidence, my digestive system had a different plan. I stayed in my sleeping bag thinking I could wish the fullness away. MIND OVER MATTER, I told myself. It made me think of my sister, Jenna, who started a nonprofit a few years ago with the same name. It helped distract me for a few minutes. Then it was go time. Despite my best effort, I was going to lose this battle. I snuck quietly out of my tent, doing my best not to wake Emma or the rest of the Daisy crew in their surrounding tents. I found the shovel, grabbed some toilet paper and made my way over to a bush that seemed worthy of receiving my shit. I started digging. Once my hole was sufficient, I released. It was a unique experience. Freeing really, and one I handled way better than I could have ever expected. However, there was one tiny problem. The only other person on this entire camp sight who was not part of our WhyNotBus happened to come out of his trailer at exactly the same time I was doing my business (clearly I did not anticipate that happening). He was an older man in his 50s or 60s from what I could guess with a salt and pepper beard. We locked eyes from about a block away. Awkward. He gave me a little nod “good morning”. I did the same with my pajama shorts and thong around my ankles as though this was a normal neighborly encounter. It wasn’t. At least not for me, but we each just continued on our merry way as though it was.

Walking back to the tent, I could feel my cheeks still painted with embarassment. I entered to find Emma had woken up and there was another surprise. Rachel had apparently slept with us as well! They told me how the three of us ended up sleeping in a tent together and I told them about my bush shit experience. Teresa (Tee) must have heard us because only a few minutes later, she came to join our tent chat too.

After breakfast we packed up our tents, belongings and were getting ready to head on out. Before leaving, we decided to have a fun little drone photoshoot. This required us all to get onto the roof of the bus. I’m not sure whose idea that was but I was foreseeing it not ending well. To my surprise, getting up wasn’t too bad with the help of Liam at the top and Sam at the bottom both assisting. Getting down was another story. Facing forward Jamie was there to catch each person one by one on the way down. Leela’s dismount was the only scary one of the pack, landing quite hard on her bum, until it was my turn. In case I havent mentioned it before, or you are new to my page, I’m afraid of heights. Terrified really. So the thought of getting down from this bus scared me from the second I decided to get onto the top of it. Looking down I could feel the butterflies dancing the hora throughout the dancefloor of my stomach; wings flapping and legs kicking. I tried to get my feet to the bus window so that the drop wasn’t as big. However, if you have read my bio, you would know I’m short. Really short. 5’1 on a good day kind of short. Apparently just a little too short to reach the window, short. So my plan, was what I would say, not flawless. Instead, as I elongated my legs as much as I could to reach the bus window, the toe of my thong/flip-flop caught it. As Jamie tried to catch me he got hold of my lower legs which meant my top half was flopping forward face first over him. It was scary. There was some flailing and I saw my life flash before my eyes. But somehow, in the end, I made it extremely ungracefully to my feet and lived to tell the tale. Luckily I had tons of time on the bus to Coral Bay to allow my heart to return to it’s normal position after my near death experience.

On the way to Coral Bay, we stopped at the Minilya Bridge Roadhouse to use the toilets and get some coffee and snacks. I’m pretty sure everyone was busting to use the toilets since almost everyone tried to avoid the bush “bathroom” experience despite my 5 star recomendation. I however was just excited for a proper coffee which i sipped slowly, cherishing the deliciousness as Rach did my nails on the bus. It felt like a spa day in comparison from where we just were. All of a sudden, the bus stopped in what seemed like the middle of nowhere. We exited the bus to find the Tropic of Capricorn landmark. We took some typical touristy pictures at which time we learned that Isa may have a secret pole dancing career as she climbed her way to the top. Prior to moving to Australia, this landmark would not really mean much to me. Now? It was part of the reason I was even still in this incredible country. On my 462 work and holiday visa, one of the stipulations for earning another year in australia was that I needed to work for 88 days on a farm in a location above the Tropic of Capricorn. So for a while last year, the Tropic of Capricorn took over every conversation, every google search every desperate call for a job to satisfy this absurd requirement.

Just before noon we arrived at the campsite we would be staying at for the next 2 days, Ningaloo Coral Bay. For some reason Emma and I had a really hard time setting up our tent today. It just didn’t look right and we couldn’t figure out why. I mean, it’s not like this was our first rodeo. Turns out we had the rain cover on the wrong way. By the time we realized, the stakes were already nailed in so we decided just to leave it. We had places to go and people to see. Well, not really but we just couldn’t be asked and the beach was calling our names.

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A bunch of us decided to go down to the beach to watch the sunset. I accidentally stepped on part of a bush on our way there. Unfortunately it was a thorny bush and my thongs were already off. It hurt like a bitch. Despite my loud scream of inapropriate language, a bunch of the other Daisy crew accidentally sat on similar thorny bushes as they grabbed their seats to enjoy the gorgeous sunset over the bay.

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It was dinner time, BBQ night! And we all couldn’t wait. We devoured it just in time to head to an open mic night at Shades Cafe at The Ningaloo reef resort, just down the street from our tents. We danced our butts off like massive idiots while the locals or other tourists laughed at us or stared in jealously and I loved every second of it. As I was dancing I kept catching ice being thrown at us by Sam and Rach. After further review, I realized Sam was taking the ice he was throwing from my drink. So that he would stop digging his grimy fingers into my drink, I went over to my captain and diet coke and chugged the whole thing. I gave him back the empty glass with ice so he could continue throwing ice at the other dancing queens and me.

The clock struck 10 and like Cinderella at midnight the music came to an end and the pub shut down. We all planned to migrate to Bills, a pub just across from where we pitched our tents, but by the time we got there, it was closed. A few people decided to head to the beach for a few more drinks since quiet hour at the campsite was 10:00 PM and they weren’t quite ready for the partying to end. I was one of the cool kids to call it a night. I had a whole day of sun waiting for me tomorrow.

Catch me if you can,
Jo Mo